On a cool Autumn’s eve Soton’s BIGGEST boys travelled to Basingstoke for what we were hoping to be another fun and exhilarating Hampshire League match. Motivated after an uplifting talk from Alex and Cappin’ Finn we got changed and started to warm up. B’stoke was very nervous of our capabilities after seeing our rigorous warm up, they took an extra-long in the changing rooms (probably pooping themselves). Eventually, once they composed themselves, they joined us in the pool and soon the match was underway. 

The first quarter started with a bang when resident show-off, Sam Dalton scored a goal in the first few minutes. Mr Ammon was feeling a bit jealous that he was not getting any attention, so he managed to get an exclusion just minutes after which costed Luke to concede a goal. Basingstoke then swiftly scored another 2 goals, ending the quarter at 3-1. 

Basingstoke, feeling confident, sent shots flying at the goal with one of our resident engineers (Luke) expertly calculating the angles to scoop the shots out of the corners but unfortunately letting 2 goals slide by him. Mr Scott then had an epiphany, realising that he knew how to catch and shoot over his defender, he scored a beautiful goal into the top right corner. With all the excitement from our previous goal, our pit defence forgot to mark the B’stoke pit attack who was loafing more than the LIDL bakery which resulted in 2 more goals. After conceding another, an enraged Alex tried to drown his attacker resulting in an exclusion that we successfully defended leading to a counterattack followed by a penalty scored by Dalton. Noah Boelmann then forgot his manners and swam over his defender and got excluded which resulted in a goal. Qi Zhe picked up some of Noah’s energy and wrestled his attacker and got also excluded which concluded the first half with another goal. 

In the break between halves, President Katie inspired Ammon to actually do something useful and score from 7 meters out (if only he could do that more often). Winning another exclusion, we set up our attack perfectly only to waste the opportunity with a dodgy pass onto another counterattack against us which forced Dalton to take a tactical exclusion, resulting in another goal. At this point the tone of the quarter shifted to a nightmare swim lane situation where we got countered constantly and were going up, down and sideways across the pool, ending the quarter at 13-4. 

Unfortunately, the final quarter started with a goal against us, and a couple wasted man ups. Dalton then got another exclusion which was followed by a goal for our opponents. Til, who was nervous to play in front of Katie, got excluded which was quickly followed by Dan conceding a tactical penalty to draw the attention away from Til. Cappin’ Finn did not want to go a game without being on the match sheet, scored one of his signature backhand shots from the weak hand side which took their goalkeeper off guard. We conceded two more goals before Dan realised, he had a mission to get wrapped like a burrito and managed to get one last exclusion with 8 seconds remaining. The team went their separate ways with some going for a McLoss, others to the pub, and the rest to home to rest for training the next night. With a final score of 18-5; the team put up a fight until the very end (maybe a bit too much in some cases). 

Man Of the Match  

Finn Thomas for his unparalleled optimism and upbeat attitude encouraging us to push ourselves throughout the entire match. 

Dick Of the Day 

Daniel Ammon for starting a streak and getting wrapped 2 games in a row. 

Goals / Majors 

Luke Bennalick- 0/0 

Sam Dalton- 2/2 

Jack James- 0/0 

Finn Thomas- 1/0 

Noah Boelmann- 0/1 

George Lea- 0/0 

Daniel Ammon- 1/3 

Til Jordan- 0/1 

Alex Wilmshurst- 0/1 

Sam Ellis- 0/0 

Qui Zhe- 0/1 

Michael Scott- 1/0