Finishers Finish Essex

2 full teams of big boys and girls arrived the Basingstoke aquadrome mostly hanging out their collective arses. The big boys then watched as the girls enjoyed 4 quarters of record setting stat padding ending in a monstrous 39-1. We were confident, but had expectations far below that, but we were taking the novel approach with the policy of if you score, you sub!

The starting seven lined up studded with a couple of the normal finishers and set off! We got off to an explosive start, with silly fresher Mr. James possible breaking the record for speed of exclusion getting kicked out almost instantaneously. The 1^st quarter then slowed down, Ammon scored, they retorted, Woody got kicked out, standard stuff.

Some may have been concerned at a 1-1 end to 1^st quarter but never us, the plan was held strong. Clearly the 1^st quarter was merely a warmup for Soton’s biggest, as goal after goal went in from Finn, Til, Luke, another from Ammon, Woody and the fine Mr. Lea. They put 2 back but who cares big bosh big quarter ending 7-3. Mr. Bennalick was playing away from his beloved posts, using his feline abilities in the outfield. In his place stood Mr. Thomas, James and now for the 3^rd and 4^th quarters, Mr. Ellis (boss music)

With the men of Essex now quaking, the 3^rd quarter got underway, Mr. Thomas showed us all he clearly took little enjoyment in actually playing the game; scoring, and again almost immediately after getting back in thus removing himself from the game again. Mr. Thomas was joined on the bench yet again by Ammon and CJ, who slipped in a beauty on his debut no less. Essex only managed to return one of these goals despite their best effort due to the prowess and elegance displayed by Ellis.

It was now time for the 4^th quarter, and what a fun game it had been, simple job from there though 4 more in the net from Boehlmann, Bennalick, James and Cho and in return a bloke called Dylan managed to get one past Ellis – can’t stop em all. This rounded us out 15-5 – a fine victory, thoroughly enjoyed by all with a whopping 9 big boys on the scoresheet, very strong stuff.

MoTM – There are many contenders for this fine award, CJ for the beautiful debut goal, Ammon for the consistency, but it simply has to go to Mr Ellis. He stopped many very good shots, communicated very well and did all of this in the deep end against his best predictions.

DoTD – While it could be said that every man present played his heart out and had a great game, there was one amongst us that boasted, that made claims of his own prowess, and did not meet them. Our very own Mr. Wilmshurst made these claims, claiming that he would score, and as you may as noted from his as of yet absence on this fine document, he did not. It’s a slit.

Goals/Majors

Finn Thomas 3/0

Til Jordan 1/0

Ed Wilkes 0/2

Sam Ellis 0/0

Noah Boehlmann 1/0

Luke Bennalick 2/0

Dan Ammon 3/0

Jack James 1/0

Alex Wilmshurst 0/1

Woody Cho 2/2

James Popple 0/0